An Interview With Mistress Odette
Also Known As MistressO


Mistress Odette is a 37 year old Lifestyle and internationally known Professional Dominatrix trained in the European style of Domination, which concentrates on psychological aspects of scening. She recently became Him, here was this big blond man with a ponytail; thick, wavy, gorgeous hair and this voice with that German accent that just boomed outÖand I just blurted out "Oh, Thor" (ed: Norse God of Thunder), and I was so embarrassed I started to giggle.

Master Bernd started coming into the bookstore almost every day to order coffee and sit around and talk about philosophy and Europe and such, and He would order these books on BDSM. The books would come in and I would look at them and read them before I called Him to tell Him they had arrived. I had read The Story of O and seen Behind the Green Door; but to Me it was all just sexy and playful, it was still in the form of bedroom play; which Ihadn't had for a long time anyway because I was with this crazy guy and the sex was all very straight and boring, never satisfying. It took a long time for Me to realize that I was a smart, beautiful, sexy woman, but what I am today comes from the experiences I have had with both My ex-husbands and the tutelage of Master Bernd. Anyway, when Master Bernd would come to the store, We would sit and talk about the books and I would ask Him all sorts of questions over coffee. He would explain to Me, and I was interested, but since I was still married and trying very hard to be a good wife I didn't feel like I could do anything about it.

Every year at the bookstore at Halloween I would throw a party at the bookstore; My birthday is October 30th and I always felt like Halloween was a national celebration of Odette's birthday. On Halloween you are allowed to express your alter ego and allow your dark side out. It is really a range of imagination that's what I tell the Mistresses that I train, if you can imagine it, then it's a kink that's out there.

The first year Bernd came to a Halloween party, about three months after We had met, He came with His slave, she was dressed with collar and the whole nine yards. He had her come up to Me and introduce herself as His slave. Now, in all My years as being sexually active I have never, ever felt jealous. And here I was, not even in a sexual relationship with this man;We were just friends; but when she came up to Me and said this to Me I wanted to choke her, kill her, scratch her eyes out and pull her hair and punch her and eliminate her from existence. The feeling lasted about thirty seconds, and I pushed it away because I was married, and didn't even remember the incident until later when Master Bernd and I were together.

He really wooed Me the whole time bringing Me underwear and make-up and presents and He taught Me how to stop hiding Myself. I started wearing sexy clothes; He took Me shopping, He was helping Me build My self-esteem. So that when I had the Halloween party a year later; the last year that I owned the bookstore; men came out of the woodwork; brought Me presents of champagne and stockings "all kinds of sexy things. I had always thought of Myself as Rapunzel; it was My nick online when I first signed on because I was trapped in this bad situation with My second husband, and just before I left him I cut My long hair; and it liberated Me. It was like I climbed down My hair and left. The party was the beginning of a whole new understanding of Myself after I left My husband I called Master Bernd and told Him that I wanted to be His slave and learn about BDSM firsthand.

What is Your basic philosophy about D/s and how do You implement this with Your submissives?

My philosophies stem from observation of human sexuality. I practice B&D; not S&M. Each individual has a unique perspective and is going to express his/her sexuality in that unique way. I believe everyone is kinky. It's a normal part of sexuality. We develop our sexual identity from the ages of birth to six. All these things that happen to us, which we may not even remember later on, we focus on; they become fetishes; they become powerful cues for us. The way we're touched, where we're touched, when we're touched, our parents attitudes towards their own sexuality and their bodies, all these things influence our own attitudes. I was taught that the body is a beautiful thing.

When I work with My submissives I have to educate them, to teach them even if they have been into the scene for a long time. What I have come to discover is that regardless of the kink or the sexual orientation, the most important thing is for the submissive to learn how to communicate his/her sexual needs and desires effectively. They need to be touched. So many of My submissives, it's so sad, they are surrounded by family and still so lonely, desperately lonely because they are not being held or talked to the way they need to be, It's like therapy. The sexual is merely a spin-off of the psychological; sexuality is a psychological phenomenon.

As a Professional Dominatrix; how do You go about taking on clients and preparing them for their sessions?

My clients, submissives, need Me, it's a professional relationship. I have a questionnaire and a standard contract, which I provide for a potential client. I insist that they answer the questions as honestly as possible. And if I feel comfortable that their answers are honest I then arrange for a meeting; usually a lunch or dinner interview. At the interview I continue the tone or theme of the questionnaire. My contract is similar to those I have seen in Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns by Philip Miller and Molly Devon, I ask about previous experience, likes and dislikes. The contract goes deeper into specifics; even things like health and such. I tell My prospective submissives to write down questions they might have so that they don't forget during the interv iew. I try to establish trust from the very beginning; I educate them; our sessions are professional but I also educate them on how to take it back to their bedrooms, to their wives or girlfriends. Sometimes I lose clients like that; because they are successful and it fulfills them.

I do not have sex with My clients. Master Bernd used to be a sex therapist back in Germany, and I do think about what I do as a form of therapy. Most of the people who come to Me have been very repressed in their sexual relationships.

They were never honest with their spouses about their interests, they never talked about their needs, and then twenty years later the kids are grown and they need more, they want to be touched and held in a certain way. What I do allows people to be themselves or express a part of themselves honestly. As long as one's sexual orientation doesn't harm others; I feel it's healthy to express them. Things like child regression or child anger; those things that were born from those formative years of zero to six; I would much rather have them come out in role-play than on the street. I role-play too, I need it, sometimes I am a little girl with Master Bernd, I didn't have much of a childhood; I had to grow up quickly when I was about three. So now I am having a childhood, and make plans with Master Bernd to be a little girl and sit on His lap and get held in a way that fulfills My needs.

How do You combine Your Dominant side with Your sexuality?

I am not much of a public player, I work in private with My clients, and in My relationships too. I don't flaunt My performances or My sexuality in public. Now, as I told Gazelle at the last Munch, there is a certain amount of sexuality that I just canít help, it oozes out of Me (ed: I have to second that). I've always been that way; it's a natural part of Me. I think we are on the way back to a time when there was Goddess worship; when men are worshipping femininity through women. I do feel like a Goddess when I put on My costume whether in public; though that is very rare; or for the submissives with whom I work. We are a symbol of femininity; they don't even see us as who we are; rather we are this Goddess to be adored and worshipped. I wouldnít want to be constantly on a pedestal all the timeÖbut within the context of what I do; I think it's a wonderful thing for the men I am with as well as Myself.

What kinds of scenes do You prefer to enact with Your clients?

I like all kinds of scenes. I like to play nurse, teacher, mommy, wife, wicked dominatrix, and kidnapper. I have played out all kinds of stories, it's fun. It's a story, a fantasy. Role-playing is used a great deal in therapy to help patients learn how to view certain sides of themselves. I use it to help people set boundaries and yet fulfill their own needs. When My client arrives for his or her session, I have already pretty much prepared in advance, have the props and scenario ready. We sit down and go over the contract again, and talk about things until I feel a level of readiness.

It's a little different when I work with couples. I have to have separate interviews and, in the beginning, separate scenes with them to bring out their individual needs in order to prepare them to share this with their partners. I like to work with Master Bernd, it's a lot more actual therapy in the beginning where we sit in the living room and just talk; to help them discover their dominant and submissive sides - teach them techniques; go over contracts and safe words. It's important to eliminate the guilt factor and teach them how to be creative and put the fun back in the bedroom in a loving way.

You charge a fee for what You do; how do You equate this to Your professionalism?

Just like so many other professions, which provide a physical service; I feel that My time and abilities are valuable. With most of the people I work with, there needs to be a clearly defined distance; that I am a professional and I am providing a service for them. W are not forming a personal relationship; most often My clients have families and lives that have no place for Me; and there is no interest in building a personal relationship. They are looking for a professional with experience and ability. I have heard horror stories about people who just play; without contracts and without built-in safety measures to allow them to get out of a bad situation. I am very careful to keep the safety rituals in tact; the process of interview and contract and of the post-session interview too. This is very new to most people, very different; they experience all these revelations about themselves, and then, what do you do, kick them out the door? No!

A scene with Me takes hours, sometimes a day or more. I'm not a revolving door; none of this fifteen-minute or one-hour stuff for Me. At the least a session with Me takes two to three hours and that includes the pre- and post-scene interviews. I have a pattern that I follow which includes letting My clients know that I am a professional yet maintaining an emotional level. I believe that the interview is the key to this. I find out enough about the person to get to know what they want, and make sure that they communicate well with Me.

I have clients who come from all over the world, and all of them are introduced to these rituals. I make sure that I am always dressed in a certain way, I am always dressed in black and wear a Mistresses collar, wear certain make-up, take out the equipment. I look the part and feel the part; the Goddess comes out in My professional Self. My goal is to reach the real inner id of that person, to reach deep down inside them to find that period of time between zero and six when they discover their sexual identity, and to share that sexuality with them. A lot of people don't allow themselves to be sexual. I get into their heads and help them to find themselves.

If I gave You a magic wand, and I asked You to make the scene in Orlando better, what would You do?

I would wave My magic wand and hope that people would become more honest about their sexuality and about human sexuality in general. It's so weird how people walk around and pretend that they're not sexual beings; that it's not part of their nature. It's like saying, "no, no I don't have a left arm". Even in the scene itself; BDSM is about sexual expression, not necessarily sexual intercourse, but still, it is sexual and emotional. It's a release on physical and emotional levels. I would wave th e wand and hope that peoplee engaged to Master Bernd.

When did You discover that You were a Dominant and how did You get into the scene?

I have always known I was sexually dominant, was sexually aware at a young age. My mother was very much into women's lib in the 1970's so I was brought up to believe in a strong female personality. It's funny, until recently I never saw Myself as petite or feminine because I have a very strong, intense personality and I keep forgetting that I am only five-foot-two, curvy and soft. I was a tomboy growing up, it was just Me and My brothe; and I was always the boss. I have always been a leader; I'm an organizer. In My personal relationships I found I got more out of them if I was in control.

I was married for ten years to a man and I was basically the mommy or dominant in the relationship; but I didn't know the terms or ritual of it. If I had known, I would probably still be married to him. But after ten years of this undefined relationship where I was making all the decisions but not getting any of the benefits, I left the marriage. It was unfulfilling. Then I made a big mistake and went in the opposite direction. I felt what I needed was a man who was always in control, and, after six-and-a-half years My second husband tried to kill Me.

WOW! What happened?

He was schizophrenic. He was really good at hiding his schizophrenia as so many of them are; the little strange things they do are attributed to stress or being tired. What happens with schizophrenics is that they can hide their disease up to a point, then they get really stressed out and they snap. I owned My own bookstore, and when it closed, within three weeks he freaked. It was progressive; he started having auditory and visual hallucinations and, to make a long story short; he locked Me in a room and interrogated Me military style for many days, I only had water to drink. I kept passing in and out of consciousness, I kept talking to him though, and finally convinced him that he had to go to the hospital. This was after being physically abused including anal rape, and in the end the police had to use pepper spray and forcibly subdue him to get him to the hospital. Fortunately, I have a very healthy attitude towards sex and so the experience didn't permanently damage Me.

How did You meet Master Bernd?

At one point I moved My bookstore from one location to another within the greater Orlando area. When I did that I decided that I wanted neon for the window signs. At the time I was organizing a series of displays for local artists in My shop and one of the artists recommended His work to Me. So I hired Master Bernd to produce the window signs for Me sight unseen. One day I had taken My bookstore manager to lunch for his birthday, and unbeknownst to Me, Master Bernd chose that day to just pop in and meet Me. One of the clerks told Him which restaurant I was in, and I was just sitting there when I heard this deep voice (editor's note: Makes Schwartzenegger sound like a girl, almost) behind Me say My name. I turned around and looked at would just be more accepting and tolerant of all the different facets of human nature. It's an amazing range of what turns us on!

We hope to hear more from MistressO soon. More photos can be found here: Photos