Overcoming Childhood Abuse Through BDSM
Speaker: Blossom
Blossom's Story Please read as a prelude to this discussion.
August 23, 1998

<Raven^> tonight we bring you Blossom, a very special lady indeed, and it is an honor to have her here

<Raven^> thank you Blossom

<Raven^> Blossom will raise a sensitive and delicate issue

<Raven^> Overcoming Childhood ABuse throught BDSM

<Raven^> Blossoms story is available on our website: http://cuffs.com/submission

<Raven^> Blossom will begin by telling us a bit of her story and we will then open the floor to questions and answers follows by an open forum

<lgirl> *listens carefully*

<Raven^> Please refrain from interrupting the discussion and greet those that enter in private

Raven^ smiles

<Raven^> Again, thank you for coming and we bring you Blossom

<Raven^> Blossom the floor is yours

<Blossom> thank you all for inviting me to a topic very close to my heart and maybe to some of your's. working threw the pains of abuse as a child and incorperating it into bdsm which is something i love was not a easy task.

<Blossom> as i said to kttn i start a topic like this with a saying bless the little children for there gift of love is unending

<Blossom> a small story about me if you have not seen my bio

<Blossom> i was born in italy my parents came to the usa when i was a baby

<Blossom> sad to say they were not around to see my upbringing i often wonder how i would be now if they were.

<Blossom> life tho to me is not alot of what if's or dweeling

<Blossom> i don't know about any of you but i don't have the time to what if the world :)

<Blossom> i was put up for adoption

<Blossom> the ppl that raised me i called my uncle and aunt all the time because i knew in my heart mon's and dad's didnt behave like they did

<Blossom> my uncle was a gambler and aunt was too

<Blossom> when my uncles friends would come over i was there gambling chip

<Blossom> who would win the little girl tonite

<Blossom> this started at age 3

<Blossom> alot of ppl say who remembers age 3 ??? you'd be surprised what a child remembers

<Blossom> this went on for years until my uncle got himself into a fix where he couldnt pay his gamblings off

<Blossom> alot of folks would be surprised how selling of a child in the usa is more out there than others would think

<Blossom> we hear of it in 3rd worlds more so than here but sad to say it happens.

<Blossom> with my selling to pay off his bills came to be a good thing in my case

<Blossom> *gasp* yes good

<Blossom> i was sold to a couple who wanted a child and my first what i call TopDom

<Blossom> i was 13 1/2 when i moved in with these ppl the wife always pampering me and the husband teaching me school

<Blossom> btw i never went to a orgainzed school so he was my teacher.

<Blossom> i would help around the house cleaning and cooking

<Blossom> but i would have wicked dreams at nite

<Blossom> i would dream of my uncle and aunt coming to get me

<Blossom> i would walk in my sleep and hide

<Blossom> my TopDom worryed alot about the abuse my uncle did to me and told me to talk about it

<Blossom> it's something kids as you all know didn't talk about and he didnt push

<Blossom> time came to do what i was there for have there child they couldn't have children so i was it

<Blossom> the nine months i tryed in vain not to think about bad things

<Blossom> my TopDom kept me in his bed so i would stop walking in my sleep and hurt the baby

<Blossom> i gave birth to a 10 lb 3 oz boy a son for the wife and TopDom :)

<Blossom> with the birth brought on a rush of remembering

<Blossom> my TopDom said it was time i was trained to learn how to use my mind and my body to do anyones dreams and wishes for and to learn how to heal my mind

<Blossom> he sent me to france to live with some kind folk as he called them to learn

<Blossom> i learned cooking the from the finsent chefs i learn sewing to make the best wears i learned the art of kneeling the proudest way i could hornor any Sir i learn to take a beating the best of any slave but i needed to learn how to control my thoughts

<Blossom> my thoughts of so many years ago were buryed in my brain

<Blossom> they gave me such rushes of hate

<Blossom> i then met liza :)

<Blossom> she zend her way into my heart and help me relizes what giving my hole self to someone was like she completed me

<Blossom> she helped me learn how to control the hate i had into a wonderful art of floggings how to release my fears in tears

<Blossom> i never cryed as a child first tears was when i was 22

<Blossom> i'm not sure if some of you release tears when being flogged or spanked i don't always but when i do they are joy tears now

<Blossom> i learn to release my uncle and aunt and get enough power to go to them when my now husband brought me back to the usa and face them

<Blossom> i had the power to walk up to them and look them in the eye and just said 2 words i remember and walked away

<Blossom> once i faced them i was free so to speak well i still have my collar but free of abuse

chyna{E} smiles

<Blossom> so you know who blossom is :)

butt^slut beams a smile at Blossom :))

<Raven^> Ladies and Gentlman

<Tunrida> amazing....

<Raven^> We will now open the floor to questions and answers anyone that has a question enter a question mark in channel

Blossom smiles at butt^slut

<Raven^> wyld go ahead

butt^slut 's flesh blushes with heat at her smile

<wyld_imp> thanks Raven.... Blossom, wonderful talk! The question i have is about this statement of yours....she helped me learn how to control the hate i had into a wonderful art of floggings how to release my fears in tears ... how were you able to do this?

<Blossom> wyld good question

<wyld_imp> :)

<Raven^> This is a reminder please refrain from interruption during Q&A if you have a question please use ? in channel

chyna{E} [chyna@208.20.34.188] has joined #submission_discuss

<Blossom> i learn the art of yogi and medition

<Blossom> i have also learn to zen to take myself into a higher plane as it were

<Blossom> it's kinda like self hypo in away

<wyld_imp> thank you, Blossom :)

<Raven^> kimi go ahead

<Blossom> so instead of gettin angry or mad i face things clearly and open now

<Blossom> done

<Raven^> go ahead kimi

<kimi{K}> based on what i've read concerning the article you have written and based on what you've said today, have you never had your own choices to make? is this ok with YOu that you haven't?????

<Blossom> kimi not until the last 2 years have i been able to have my own say in what i do

<Blossom> yes i do work but my husband got me that job

<Blossom> i have now my own checking accts and can shop freely now

<Blossom> i even have my first love of my own *points at peh*

<Blossom> :)

<^peh^> :)

<Blossom> done

<Raven^> chyna please ask your question

wyld_imp pokes chyna.

<chyna{E}> Blossom.. you have been thru an amazing ordeal and have reached an empowerment.. what if im not too nosy to as k did your former owners say to you when you faced them??

<chyna{E}> im sorry im going thru the irc cha cha cha...

<Blossom> chyna{E} i didn't give them time to reply i didn't want to hear what they had to say it wouldnt have matterd it was past and it wouldnt have brought my childhood back

<Blossom> my husband just took my hand and we left

<Blossom> done

<Raven^> wyld please ask

<wyld_imp> how were you able to release the demons that haunted you during the early years of training? Did you have the meditation, zen & relaxing techniques way back then?

<Blossom> wyld_imp in the years i was with my TopDom after *school* he would have me lay down and breath like a deep breathing relaxtion thing

<Blossom> he would do that before i was to do my house work

<Blossom> i never really released my demons as it were till i learn now to zen

<Blossom> zenning has opened a hold new life for me and helps me live :)

<Blossom> done

<Raven^> With all the decisions that were made on your behalf and all the choices that others took away from you, if you were given another chance at this life, would you do it the same way?

<Blossom> Raven i would say minus my uncle and aunt i think i would have done things the same way

<Blossom> i know that sounds strange

<Blossom> but from my TopDom on i remember nothing but sharing and giving and time

<Blossom> i felt good at that point

<Blossom> done

<Raven^> KttN the floor is yours

<TM`sKttN> It sounds to me like you had discussed your former abuse with your husband/Master and that he is very supportive. What to you recommend to a dominant when his submissive tells him that here past includes childhood abuse?

<TM`sKttN> and if it isn't too personal, what were two words you said before leaving you adoptive parents?

Blossom smiles my husband of 25 years is very supportive :)

<Blossom> when he got me he knew my history

<Blossom> when i came to him he had a time trying to get me in the same bed with him

<Blossom> and to stop eattin on the floor over a bowl and to keep me from hiding under the sink in the kitchen if i think i did something bad

<Blossom> i still do some of those things habits are hard to break but my husband wants me WITH him not hiding from him

<Blossom> and the 2 words i said when i faced my uncle and aunt was *i remember*

<Blossom> done

<Raven^> wow

<TM`sKttN> thank you:)

<Raven^> ummm nin-nin you are next

<nin-nin> first sorry for my English

<Blossom> nin-nin i'm from italy so not a problem :)

<nin-nin> I wanted to ask you about your feelings right now. what or how do you feel telling us your story

<nin-nin> 2. question

<nin-nin> would you go to the court and tell your story too

<nin-nin> finito :)

<Blossom> nin-nin i was scared nervous sweaty it always brings up things that are best forgotten and i know i'll have to zen a bit more to sleep tonite but it's important for healing to get these things out

<Blossom> and would i go to court? i have been to court when my uncle wanted me back and knew he had made a bad mistake

<Blossom> but the courts awarded me to TopDom

<Blossom> done

<Raven^> butt^slut please go ahead

<butt^slut> okie..

<butt^slut> what advice can you give us subs..trying to mold themselves for our domme's special needs

<Blossom> watching is the key to learning

<Blossom> listening is the answer to questions

butt^slut nods..attentively

<Blossom> i learn to know my owners needs before they know there needs

<Blossom> body movements helps to learn where they are going and what they need

<Blossom> knowing a Dom/me's need s takes time set and talk with them have what i call date nite

<Blossom> date nite is a once a week time where he/she spelles out there needs and wants

<Blossom> it also gives a sub/slave time to watch there movements and learn :)

<Blossom> done

butt^slut nods..oh thank you Blossom..very nice ideas

Raven^ hands the mic to psyche

<Raven^> the floor is yours

<psyche> would you share how you came to be given to your husband,,,, and with the previous abuse,,, were you ever alittle apprehensive upon your arrival?

<Blossom> psyche i'm not sure if you have read the market place or not

<psyche> no,,i haven't,,,,i apologize

<Blossom> in the underground world yes those place are there

psyche did not do her homework

<Blossom> its a book on where Dom/me's see slave and buy them

<Blossom> tho where i was was not any where like the market place

<Blossom> it happens just the same and i was very lucky in who got me :)

<Blossom> done

<Raven^> wyld^imp do your thing then karenina

<wyld_imp> Do you see your son at all? i understood you had him for "them" but isn't he still _yours_?

<Blossom> wyld *smiles* first time i saw him was 3 years ago

<wyld_imp> isn't he still yours though, Blossom?

<Blossom> we didnt hit it off to well what he thought i had done was way icky

<Blossom> yes he is mine sad to say the woman that raised him died when he was 22

<Blossom> so he wanted to know who i was

<wyld_imp> thank you Blossom :)

<wyld_imp> that had to have been so hard for you ... i applaud your courage

Raven^ smiles softly

<Blossom> he's dad told him and we met it didnt take off tho until his daughter needed a bone marrow and now we are close cuzzin i was a match for her:)

<wyld_imp> she is well today?

<Blossom> yes she is and fat :)

<Blossom> done

<wyld_imp> great! :)

<Raven^> butt^slut please ask your question

wyld_imp pokes butt^slut but not in da butt.

<butt^slut> okie

<butt^slut> can you describe this marketplace..seems strange..yet ...

<Blossom> butt^slut its like a place where slaves are blindfolded and Dom/me's come in and inspect :)

<Blossom> then they bid to the ppl who have put time and engery into the sub and the deal is done

<Blossom> done

<Raven^> Blossom how is your life today? I assume you are a fully and completely your Masters slave, how do you behave in public when around people who have no knowledge of your status and lifestyle?

<Blossom> Raven most ppl that know me know i'm a slave i dont hide it i am branded and marked i have my collar and i'm proud at who i am

<Blossom> i workd damn hard at my title so hell i'm goina fling it about ;)

<Blossom> ppl do ask what my tats mean and so on i just tell em

<Blossom> i have my owne name with my blossom in the middle so its not you pernorm art work :)

<Blossom> ppl at my job have seen my collar too some ask some dont and stair :)

<Blossom> i like my life now i have some freedom to do and learn things outside the home

<Blossom> which is scarey at times but good like i went to my first movie house this year it was a nice treat :)

<Blossom> i've not yet gone to a macdonldes yet but maybe next year :)

<Blossom> done

<Raven^> okay

<Raven^> Artful please ask away

<Raven^> we have room for one more question and then Blossom will need to go

<Artful-> Do you have any particular rituals?

<Artful-> that are required by your master I mean'

<Blossom> Artful yes as in my bio most know i am with my husband i do have other owners

<Blossom> my husband wanted me to learn how to be a wife but knew i still wanted to be a slave

<Blossom> when i visit and i deplane i fall on my knees in the airport kiss there palms and either am leashed to go out of the airport on my knees or walk out

<Blossom> done

<Raven^> please ARtful ask away

<Artful-> Can you explain how you have many owners.. I dont understand how you can have more than one?

Blossom smiles it can be comfusing at times :)

<Raven^> this would be the last question for this evening as Blossom has to go she has to wake up rather early

<Blossom> some time ago my husband and mine relationship changed

<Blossom> he wanted to see how i would be in the *real world* as a wife and not a slave so to speak

<Blossom> he's been training me to see if i can go on if he dies which i hope dont happen but ya never know

<Blossom> he also knows i crave ownership

<Blossom> i need to have that title of slave

<Blossom> he has lent me so to speak to a couple in sf

<Blossom> i got a thing for couples it seems ;)

Raven^ smiles

<Blossom> while i get what i crave from them they also get what they want from me

<Blossom> my husband who btw has other subs gets his needs met in that manner and i learn to be a wife :)

<Blossom> done :)

<TM`sKttN> Blossom thank you so much:)

<Blossom> thank you very much for havin me

<Raven^> and with this will will close this discussion, Blossom a special thank you

<Raven^> you are a couragous and a special woman

<wyld_imp> thank you thank you thank you Blossom! :)

<sheela_39> thank you, Blossom :)))

<Blossom> thank you Raven

<Raven^> I admire your strength and inner beauty

<Artful-> thank you Blossom

<Blossom> and everyone :)

<raianna> thank you Blossom :)

<TM`sKttN> i can see future discussions too if you will have us again:)

<psyche> thank you very much Blossom

<Raven^> and thank you everyone for attending

<Blossom> thank you Artful and for the use of your web too

<^ponygrl^> thanks Blossom, and aMstrMind sends his best to you too :)

<Blossom> TM`skttn i'd enjoy that

<Artful-> awww... but thank KttN

<Blossom> ponygrl i thought that was you *hugs* ltns

<Blossom> Kttn again thank you :)

<TM`sKttN> you are very welcome hon:)

<Blossom> i have to be up at 330 so thank you again for having me

^ponygrl^ hugs Blossom :)

Raven^ smiles

<Blossom> maybe i can stay a bit longer next time :)

downabell hugs Blossom

Blossom kisses her love peh for holding her hand

Blossom hugs downabell :)

^peh^ smiles and was proud to do so

^peh^ kisses Blossom

<TM`sKttN> any time is good time:)

<Blossom> good nite and thank you again for your time

downabell smiles

Blossom has left #submission_discuss

<Raven^> good night everyone

Raven^ smiles

<Raven^> good night John Boy

<sheela_39> good night, A/all

<TM`sKttN> hehe just bad Raven

Raven^ hugs KttN

<TM`sKttN> *hugs* and thanks

<Raven^> I wouldn't be Raven if I werent bad would I now?

Raven^ winks and disappears

<TM`sKttN> thank you everyone for coming